Favourite Quotes – Episode 1

In Funny on July 15, 2007 at 9:58:21 pm

So, if you have read all the wonderful things that has to offer, you’ll know that the following quotes are probably not the most appropriate excerpts of literature in the world.

So we were supposed to have a guest speaker in one of my classes
to talk about diversity and racism and shit today
prof’s never met him..
in walks this super black gangsta ghetto dude
he’s got a ‘pimp’ chain around his neck, wearing FUBU everything
has a gold watch and a ring on each finger, smells like pot and beer
he even had a do-rag on and a cigarrette tucked behind his ear
walks in in true rapper style flashing his crazy ghetto signs at us
the prof’s like…’are you… jeff?’
he goes ‘true dat, ho’ and says ‘you all my niggaz!’ and he turns in a circle
waving his arms in the air singing about ‘niggaz in ‘da house’ or some shit
so she tells him to give his speech on diversity and shit
and he starts talkin about ‘the man’ and how ‘white folk be dissin’
then like a minute later this other black dude runs in dressed in a suit
and says ‘sorry I’m late’
it turns out the first black dude was just baked. he doesn’t even go to college
he just wanted to buy weed in the dorms

(PJ) grrr
(PJ) a car alarm is going off
(PJ) fuck
(PJ) its our car

did you hear about the magic tractor?
it went down the hill and turned into a field!!!
did you hear about the magic tom?
he went down the hill and I stabbed him in the face

my gf supposedly has “issues” with me
Heh, my ex didn’t have just a few issues, she had a fuckin *Subscription*

god damn i just farted HARD on my chair and it felt good
did it lift u off?
yeah good thing i was wearing my seatbelt

(Null-O): Women without teeth give the best head.
(Null-O): They “gum it”.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: